Wednesday, March 15, 2006
if things don’t go my way I’m filing a 498a
I believe lot of these women who end up filing 498a’s are inherently very insecure and weak. They appear to have craved for attention and control all their life. They are not willing to commit to a relationship and bear the ups and downs of marrried life.
Also, something strangely familiar with most of these women is the role of their father and mother in their parents marraige. Allow me to clarify, IMO, women coming from homes where the father is a dodo and nothing short of a doormat tend to be most vengeful. Simple reason being girls have seen their fathers getting trounced by their wives (aka the girls mother) all their life and their fathers squirming at the thought of his wife giving him some 3rd degree. With time girls begin to rationalise that men are meant to be controlled and ridiculed by their wives. Hence the hard stance - if things don’t go my way I’m filing a 498a.
This is just my observation. Some of the most successful marriages I have seen with friends and relatives are those where the girls father is very strong and knows the rights and wrongs of life and relationships. Lot of parents screw up their daughters marriages by allowing them to complain about their husbands and inlaws in fact sometimes even encouraging such behavior. This takes away the element of respect and harmony between the wife and husband which is essential for any successful relationship. Remember there is no such thing as designer husbands or wives or in-laws. Everything takes time to shape up.
Also, something strangely familiar with most of these women is the role of their father and mother in their parents marraige. Allow me to clarify, IMO, women coming from homes where the father is a dodo and nothing short of a doormat tend to be most vengeful. Simple reason being girls have seen their fathers getting trounced by their wives (aka the girls mother) all their life and their fathers squirming at the thought of his wife giving him some 3rd degree. With time girls begin to rationalise that men are meant to be controlled and ridiculed by their wives. Hence the hard stance - if things don’t go my way I’m filing a 498a.
This is just my observation. Some of the most successful marriages I have seen with friends and relatives are those where the girls father is very strong and knows the rights and wrongs of life and relationships. Lot of parents screw up their daughters marriages by allowing them to complain about their husbands and inlaws in fact sometimes even encouraging such behavior. This takes away the element of respect and harmony between the wife and husband which is essential for any successful relationship. Remember there is no such thing as designer husbands or wives or in-laws. Everything takes time to shape up.
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Satya...
this is hardhitting comment that has come from the guts!!!
not just amazing observation but also the manner in which you have articulated.
regards
milind
this is hardhitting comment that has come from the guts!!!
not just amazing observation but also the manner in which you have articulated.
regards
milind
I think as long as section 498a and 406 is in place a man who gets married in India is a fool. With such laws for an indian to get married is like putting his head under the gullotine because a single statement by the wife is sure to get him, his parents and friends arrested.
The only way out is to just live with a woman after getting an affidavit signed by her in court that she is living and producing children without marriage
The problem is compounded because the law is implemented unfairly too. Just applying section 406 should get a girls parents arrested too if the law is followed because giving of dowry is also an offence. Further the courts take perjury very lightly which is incorrect.
The dowry law is also vauge because it says giving and taking of dowry is an offence but gifts can be given. How do you distinguish between gift and dowry? If the law is serious about the issue both should be banned.It is like saying you cant eat but you can chew and swallow your food.
As long as such a legal system is in place any person who marries in India is a fool.
The only way out is to just live with a woman after getting an affidavit signed by her in court that she is living and producing children without marriage
The problem is compounded because the law is implemented unfairly too. Just applying section 406 should get a girls parents arrested too if the law is followed because giving of dowry is also an offence. Further the courts take perjury very lightly which is incorrect.
The dowry law is also vauge because it says giving and taking of dowry is an offence but gifts can be given. How do you distinguish between gift and dowry? If the law is serious about the issue both should be banned.It is like saying you cant eat but you can chew and swallow your food.
As long as such a legal system is in place any person who marries in India is a fool.
Indians
SOME VERY IMPRESSIVE FACTS ABOUT INDIANS IN USA !!!
There are 3.22 Million Indians in America
38% of Doctors in America are Indians.
12% of Scientists in America are Indians.
36% of NASA employees are Indians.
34% of MICROSOFT employees are Indians
28% of IBM employees are Indians
17% of INTEL employees are Indians
13% of XEROX employees are Indians
23% of Indian Community in America is having Green-Card'
Above information from an email
So why they went to USA in the first place?
Why so many more still want to go to USA and UK in 2006?
WAKE UP INDIA.
SOME VERY IMPRESSIVE FACTS ABOUT INDIANS IN USA !!!
There are 3.22 Million Indians in America
38% of Doctors in America are Indians.
12% of Scientists in America are Indians.
36% of NASA employees are Indians.
34% of MICROSOFT employees are Indians
28% of IBM employees are Indians
17% of INTEL employees are Indians
13% of XEROX employees are Indians
23% of Indian Community in America is having Green-Card'
Above information from an email
So why they went to USA in the first place?
Why so many more still want to go to USA and UK in 2006?
WAKE UP INDIA.
# posted by 
: 7:02 AM, November 03, 2006
: 7:02 AM, November 03, 2006
They used to say when you marry a lady, the 2 families also get married. The problems get sorted out by the 2 families. But remember now…..REMEMBER…..NRI guy and and others dont only marry an Indian lady from India but also marries the Indian police, who are the first ones to arrest you before you are found guilty. Why we blame the law? The law is there. The people who put the law in place are the ones to take the responsibility. So why marry an lady from India in the first place
# posted by : 11:04 AM, November 09, 2006
: 11:04 AM, November 09, 2006
FROM THIS 498A SECTION AND HOW IT WORKS, IT SEEMS THAT IT IS VERY VERY SAFE FOR AN INDIAN LADY FROM INDIA TO MARRY AN INDIAN POLICE-MAN, INDIAN MAN LAWYER, INDIAN MAN JUDGE. .....ARE THEY ALL PERFECT AND UNTOUCHABLE BY THE LAW???!!! AND IS THE REST OF THE MEN POPULATION UNTOUCHABLE BY THE WOMEN POPULATION???!!! UK PERSON.
# posted by : 1:07 AM, November 18, 2006
: 1:07 AM, November 18, 2006
Lot needs to be done to have good population of men police, men lawyers, men judges etc before letting these women go to these men. I say this because men are not trusted as per the law. It is like a case where a woman law maker is sending a poor cow to a lion hoping that the lion is a vegetarian. Note for the law maker (specially the female law maker):- Please first sort out other problems before this creates more problems for the society. UK Guy
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# posted by : 4:56 PM, December 01, 2006
: 4:56 PM, December 01, 2006 << Home
