Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Why would an Indian Man marry?
Guys,
We need to work together and request immediate changes in IPC-498a, to stop it's rampant misuse. I am totally against dowry, but IPC-498a gives a free ticket to wife to harass husband's family at her whim and choice. I request change or remove IPC-498a to curb it's rampant misuse.
I am sure an average Indian man, if knows about the IPC-498a (which most of very educated males do not know), will have to think twice whether marriage will be good for him or his family in long run (even if it is a love marrage).
What if wife is mean and arrogant?
What if wife does not want to live with his joint family?
What if wife does not want to have more than one kid?
What if wife does not do household work (cook dinner, keep place clean, laundry etc.) which are considered normal daily job in Indian society?
What if she very short tempered and argues without a valid argument?
What if she cheats or steals from home?
Would husband be able to confront, knowing that he and his family can go to jail on one single oral report of his wife in the near-by police station?
What are husband's options other that to keep quite, bear the torture, because even if wife does a suicide drama, all the hell will break loose on husband's family?
- Satya
We need to work together and request immediate changes in IPC-498a, to stop it's rampant misuse. I am totally against dowry, but IPC-498a gives a free ticket to wife to harass husband's family at her whim and choice. I request change or remove IPC-498a to curb it's rampant misuse.
I am sure an average Indian man, if knows about the IPC-498a (which most of very educated males do not know), will have to think twice whether marriage will be good for him or his family in long run (even if it is a love marrage).
What if wife is mean and arrogant?
What if wife does not want to live with his joint family?
What if wife does not want to have more than one kid?
What if wife does not do household work (cook dinner, keep place clean, laundry etc.) which are considered normal daily job in Indian society?
What if she very short tempered and argues without a valid argument?
What if she cheats or steals from home?
Would husband be able to confront, knowing that he and his family can go to jail on one single oral report of his wife in the near-by police station?
What are husband's options other that to keep quite, bear the torture, because even if wife does a suicide drama, all the hell will break loose on husband's family?
- Satya
Comments:
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1. What if wife is mean and arrogant?
Marry a woman only after understanding her nature. Don't jump in for any girl your parents or relatives bring for you. Same applies to women as well. Just don't jump in for any guy. Seemingly sweet guy and his parents can be the most evil people on earth. Investigate them entirely. No hurry! Hence no worries later!
2. What if wife does not want to live with his joint family?
Guys usually assume a lot of things, so that implicitly said things always let them gain a upper hand, since our traditional Indian society is oppressive in nature for women. Hence, even though guys play - the hide and then seek to attack game - a girl should always ask the guy whether he would live in a joint family after marriage. Hey girls wake up! You can even think of staying as single mothers, adopting children rather than marry into a mean family which rule your entire existence.
3. What if wife does not want to have more than one kid?
Having kids, running the household is as much a decision of the girl as for the guy. Damn man why didn't you read out your entire life expectations to the girl before you even entered matrimony with her?? Didn't you cheat her when you didn't explain your expectations to her beforehand. How does a woman's decision have any lower value than a man's?
4. What if wife does not do household work (cook dinner, keep place clean, laundry etc.) which are considered normal daily job in Indian society?
Normal daily job in Indian society! What a moron you are!!!!
I am a qualified Indian woman living my life on my own terms. Not that my family was rich or I am rich. In my case, I did't even have my parents support for my marriage. Thanks to guys and their families of your kind, my parents lost faith in this entire system and left me do my marriage choice myself.
Which now I feel was lucky for me! I have seen two generation of daughter-in-law, firstly my mother and then myself. I can conclude from 27 years of this knowledge, that if a girl if happy in her home and left free, MENTALLY and physically, she can do a lot of things other than household, out of love and compassion. She needs that space and freedom too. They are not legally bought servants. Hey junkie, the days of slavery are over. Pitch in yourself for the work too!
5. What if she very short tempered and argues without a valid argument?
I see your questions are not valid since they lack the sound reasoning. How can such a unreasonable man reason with anyone?
6. What if she cheats or steals from home?
Some one can steal/cheat only that which is not his/hers. This explains that you have failed to provide something basic - her home, her family.
And so you find it as stealing and cheating.
7. Would husband be able to confront, knowing that he and his family can go to jail on one single oral report of his wife in the near-by police station?
Nobody in the world has the right to abuse anybody. If you have the proof for this - gather it and file for divorce and free yourself. Or are you that kind of wicked Indian cat, who lingers for the worst and makes hue and cry for pity, help and attention.
8. What are husband's options other that to keep quite, bear the torture, because even if wife does a suicide drama, all the hell will break loose on husband's family?
A sane human being would never fall prey to any of such tactics. Every woman should also know this that if guys/guy's parents are playing the emotional game, dump him and never see their faces again. Life is not a friction mill, where everyday, one goes through this drill again and again. Become an independent woman, many are there in this world to respect and admire you. When we Indians are going to stop making our lives an Ekta Kapoor's serial is God unknown yet!
I dont know whether my response would be posted on this site, as I don't find this guy even reasonable. But I dont want the readers to lose their rationality. Hence I am taking this effort. Also I have a copy of my original response which I will post on my blog soon.
Thanks
Marry a woman only after understanding her nature. Don't jump in for any girl your parents or relatives bring for you. Same applies to women as well. Just don't jump in for any guy. Seemingly sweet guy and his parents can be the most evil people on earth. Investigate them entirely. No hurry! Hence no worries later!
2. What if wife does not want to live with his joint family?
Guys usually assume a lot of things, so that implicitly said things always let them gain a upper hand, since our traditional Indian society is oppressive in nature for women. Hence, even though guys play - the hide and then seek to attack game - a girl should always ask the guy whether he would live in a joint family after marriage. Hey girls wake up! You can even think of staying as single mothers, adopting children rather than marry into a mean family which rule your entire existence.
3. What if wife does not want to have more than one kid?
Having kids, running the household is as much a decision of the girl as for the guy. Damn man why didn't you read out your entire life expectations to the girl before you even entered matrimony with her?? Didn't you cheat her when you didn't explain your expectations to her beforehand. How does a woman's decision have any lower value than a man's?
4. What if wife does not do household work (cook dinner, keep place clean, laundry etc.) which are considered normal daily job in Indian society?
Normal daily job in Indian society! What a moron you are!!!!
I am a qualified Indian woman living my life on my own terms. Not that my family was rich or I am rich. In my case, I did't even have my parents support for my marriage. Thanks to guys and their families of your kind, my parents lost faith in this entire system and left me do my marriage choice myself.
Which now I feel was lucky for me! I have seen two generation of daughter-in-law, firstly my mother and then myself. I can conclude from 27 years of this knowledge, that if a girl if happy in her home and left free, MENTALLY and physically, she can do a lot of things other than household, out of love and compassion. She needs that space and freedom too. They are not legally bought servants. Hey junkie, the days of slavery are over. Pitch in yourself for the work too!
5. What if she very short tempered and argues without a valid argument?
I see your questions are not valid since they lack the sound reasoning. How can such a unreasonable man reason with anyone?
6. What if she cheats or steals from home?
Some one can steal/cheat only that which is not his/hers. This explains that you have failed to provide something basic - her home, her family.
And so you find it as stealing and cheating.
7. Would husband be able to confront, knowing that he and his family can go to jail on one single oral report of his wife in the near-by police station?
Nobody in the world has the right to abuse anybody. If you have the proof for this - gather it and file for divorce and free yourself. Or are you that kind of wicked Indian cat, who lingers for the worst and makes hue and cry for pity, help and attention.
8. What are husband's options other that to keep quite, bear the torture, because even if wife does a suicide drama, all the hell will break loose on husband's family?
A sane human being would never fall prey to any of such tactics. Every woman should also know this that if guys/guy's parents are playing the emotional game, dump him and never see their faces again. Life is not a friction mill, where everyday, one goes through this drill again and again. Become an independent woman, many are there in this world to respect and admire you. When we Indians are going to stop making our lives an Ekta Kapoor's serial is God unknown yet!
I dont know whether my response would be posted on this site, as I don't find this guy even reasonable. But I dont want the readers to lose their rationality. Hence I am taking this effort. Also I have a copy of my original response which I will post on my blog soon.
Thanks
# posted by 
: 4:33 PM, April 29, 2008
: 4:33 PM, April 29, 2008
Hi Pallavi,
Thanks for taking time and leaving the comments. What if things were quite explicitly discussed before marriage and the girl changed her mind just after marriage? This is not about men Vs. women. This is about legal process which surrounds around marital problems.
Search the internet about with '498a' and discover the whole new world out there.
Post a Comment
Thanks for taking time and leaving the comments. What if things were quite explicitly discussed before marriage and the girl changed her mind just after marriage? This is not about men Vs. women. This is about legal process which surrounds around marital problems.
Search the internet about with '498a' and discover the whole new world out there.
# posted by : 4:45 PM, April 29, 2008
: 4:45 PM, April 29, 2008 << Home
